35 Excuses Keeping You From Being Happy

by Amy on July 27, 2016

No excuses - Just happy
No excuses. Just happy.

My mom used to call me a “malcontent.” I hated it when she called me that. But now I see that she was right. I always had a reason why I couldn’t be happy. Here are a few excuses I used to make that kept me from being happy. Chances are you’ve got a few yourself. See if you can spot your excuses in the list below. If you don’t see yours, add it in the comments below.

I can’t be happy because…

  1. My husband/friend/mother/kid isn’t happy.
  2. There’s so much suffering in the world.
  3. My kids would suffer.
  4. My family wouldn’t approve.
  5. I need to live up to my potential.
  6. I need to do something “important” with my life.
  7. I have to prove myself.
  8. I don’t deserve to be.
  9. There’s too much to do.
  10. I can’t afford it.
  11. I get more respect when I suffer.
  12. People need to know how hard I work.
  13. I haven’t lost enough weight.
  14. I haven’t met my financial goal.
  15. I’d be boring.
  16. I have to sacrifice my happiness to help others.
  17. It’s selfish.
  18. It’s frivolous.
  19. I’ll become lazy.
  20. I don’t know how.
  21. I don’t know what I like.
  22. I’m not attractive enough.
  23. I don’t fit into my jeans.
  24. I haven’t accomplished enough.
  25. I’m too accomplished.
  26. I’ve made too many mistakes.
  27. I have bad hair.
  28. I’m not as good as her.
  29. I’m not cool.
  30. The things I like aren’t cool.
  31. I don’t fit in.
  32. They don’t like me.
  33. They didn’t invite me.
  34. I need a drink to be happy.
  35. I need the right outfit.

I’ve finally proved my mom wrong. I’m not making excuses any more. I’m finally happy. How about you?

{ 3 comments }

You are five.

by Amy on February 25, 2015

Alice and Anthony

Who were you when you were five?

When I was five…

I loved flowers — I vividly remember the plants from my childhood – the sunflowers in my backyard, the rose bushes by the patio, the filbert orchards and the Oregon grapes with berries you couldn’t really eat.

I loved to swim – that feeling of being under the water on a hot day was magical.

I could play for hours by myself (I liked the company of my Barbies over the company of real people).

I made “funbooks” for my little brother, full of mazes and puzzles, word searches and pictures to color.

I loved animals, desperately. My best friend was my dog Jamie and my cat Charity.

I was an artist. I drew horses and roses and forests.

After all the years of thinking I should be smart, accomplished and pretty…

I now just want to be like my five year old self again, full of wonder and joy and curiosity.

That five year old girl who didn’t know there was anything she was supposed to do, like or be.

I’m convinced there’s nothing to fix about any of us.

We just need to re-connect with our five-year-old selves before we ever learned the word “should.”

That five-year-old version of you is your ticket home.

Never forget who you are.

Fittingly, my daughter Joy is five.

And because I never want her to forget…

Joy Elizabeth Albano. You are five.

IMG_8875

You…

You love your stuffies. Every single one of them. Especially Alien, Harold, Giraffy, Maria and Olaf. And you treat them like they are real.

You are content to play alone in your  room. I hear you in there singing to your toys and it makes me smile.

If I let you, you would wear your purple shirt and pants every single day. I have to wash them for special occasions. You made me wash them before family Music Together and for your school play.

You are the family staring contest champion.

You are FUNNY. Last week you had us laughing so hard we literally fell of the chair. You were telling us a reallllyyyyy long ghost story. I wish you could see your facial expressions.

You love to write books. One of your favorite topics: “It was very windy.” Then you draw circles and circles all over the page.

You love to lip synch to the “Rio” soundtrack.

You say stuff like:

“Mom, at night I go outside. Yep. I wait until everyone is sleeping and then I go outside and I play until it’s morning.”

You are all love.

My twins are eight.

And because I never want them to forget…

Alice Kathleen Albano. You were five.

Alice

You …

Loved rainbows. The moon. Fairies. Unicorns. You called yourself a “real princess.” You made fairy houses.

You were a true fashionista who loved to window shop for “pretty dresses.” (And you got really mad at me that day when I didn’t let you go into the shoe store.)

Your smile and your laugh lit up a room. When strangers heard your guffaw they laughed out loud, on the spot.

You loved to play mama – to your little sister and the earth – the rocks, leaves, bugs, flowers…

Strangely, you were a natural at hulu dancing and writing Japanese characters..???

You wanted to be in a parade. When we went to see the Fresh Beat Band you told me you wanted to be on stage.

You loved to tell stories and write them. You asked me to write while you narrated and I could never write as fast as the stories you told.

You could outrun everyone in the family (except me).

You loved swimming and being in the water. I think your totem animal is a dolphin.

For being such a gentle girl, you were really competitive. You loved races and contests and trying to get your pajamas on by the time I count to ten.

You would draw by yourself for hours. You loved your pencils and your sketchbook – you could draw birds like no other.

You were obsessed with candy. And TV. Except you didn’t like to watch scary stuff because it will get in your head, you’d say.

You talked like this…

“Mama you sing beautiful. Oh your wedding ring, it’s so pretty. Look! The trees are dancing!”

Most of this is still true about you. Some things have changed. You are all love.

Anthony Michael Albano. You were five.

Anthony

You…

Loved to climb. You could already do the monkey bars (plus skip a bar) all by yourself. (And you hang upside down on the bar in the elevator while it’s moving–it was your latest trick.)

You loved ninja turtles. The only way I got you to wear those red short is by telling you that Raphael chose them.

You favorite character in Pinocchio was Lampwick. When I asked you why you said, “because he turned into a donkey.” I think it’s because you’re fascinated by transformation (but then again I’m a life coach).

You were always extremely sensitive to negative energy. It freaked you out. Always has.

If you got in trouble the only way to calm you down is to give you a hug and lots of love. I told them that at school and the teacher says it works like a charm.

You loved your friends. Your best friend was Duncan and you two were inseparable.

You loved to build things and figure out how stuff works. (You destroyed your sleeping mat at school, pulled the fluff right out. I told the teacher it wasn’t because you were being bad, you just wanted to see what was in there.)

You loved Legos. The more complicated the better. I am still your Lego partner.

You were very good at drawing. Your pictures were really detailed. You drew robots and ninja turtles, of course.

You loved to make people laugh.

You were very sweet and kind to your little sister. When she gets hurt, she often went to you or her sister for a hug.

Your favorite book was called Salmon Stream. You’d make us read it over and over. I think your totem animal is a Salmon.

This is how you talk:

You: “Hey mom, look under there!”

Me: “Under where?”

You: “You said underwear! See I can make you laugh!”

So much of this is still true about you. Some things are different. You are all love.

Now it’s your turn. Tell us about your five-year-old self? Leave a comment below!

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{ 16 comments }

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